Tales of a strange commute
Author tells the behind-the-scenes on 'the way to really fly'

By Kat Gresey
Assistant A&E Editor

For 54-year-old Mike Holinka, a workweek can involve everything from getting puked on and flashed by women, to watching people end their lives. For almost 30 years, Holinka has been a train conductor on Metra's West Line, where he has seen his fair share of surprising, often hilarious and sometimes saddening events.

Forty of these amazing stories can be found in Holinka's new book, That's What I Call Commuting, co-written by his friend and long-time Metra rider Ed Gabrielse.

Holinka's stories span the decades. Some stories tell of cheating spouses, pantyless ladies and drunks unable to contain their bodily fluids.

The book has been well received by passengers and Metra workers alike and has been picked up by numerous media outlets.

"[The reaction has been] 100 percent positive," Holinka said. "Every person, old, young, men, women-they like it."

Holinka attributes the success of his book to its wide variety of stories, which vary from funny to tragic.

One of his favorite tales is "Bull Market Johnny," about a man with one leg who wore a makeshift prosthesis (despite the fact he had a medical one) for years and collected hundreds of dollars a day from traders on the exchange who believed he was a good luck icon.

There are sad stories as well. Holinka has been involved in more than 40 train accidents where people were killed.

"I remember every one as though it were yesterday," he writes in "My First Train Accident." "It never becomes easier."

Due to the tragic or embarrassing nature of some of the stories, some identifying facts had to be changed. "We wanted no one to make the connection [to these people]," Holinka said. "So, we scrambled the stations and times."

Every one of the stories is true, though, he insisted. He added that 95 percent of the stories were ones that happened to him-no matter how unbelievable they may be.

"You get used to it," he said. "But I have learned not to say that I think I've seen everything."

A second book of stories is planned for sometime next year. There are already 20 in the works, and people can submit ideas through Holinka's website at www.thatswhaticallcommuting.com.

Holinka believes the next book will be even better. Though he has not read the first book, he said he is very happy with what he and Gabrielse have accomplished.

"When we were finally done, we didn't know what we had," he said. "It's a little overwhelming."

An interview with Holinka and Gabrielse will be aired on CBS at 8:20 a.m. on Jan. 17.